My name is JD I have been on this earth for forty- five years. In that time I have done as much and sometimes more evil in GODS eyes than most that will be reading this. Most people didn’t know me those that did feared what I was capable of. I had no true friends and didn’t want any. I had been in foster care since a young child and knew better than to count on others. Funny thing at thirteen I asked JESUS to forgive me and be my LORD. For two years He was, then my sister died when I was sixteen my best friend she was thirty-two with two children. I used it as an excuse to run away from GOD.

I hurt people, I hated everyone and everything especially Christians. I lived by the slogan “Do unto others before they do unto you”. I cheated people, hurt those that loved me basically destroyed every relationship I had. I married a young woman when I was twenty named Lorie, I loved her but didn’t know how to show it or share it.

 She would beg me to go to church, my response; “Don’t ask me again Lorie! I don’t want to hear about your GOD!” others would ask me I would tell them I served satan (little did I know how true this was). I played all the games the world had to offer. I lived sex, drugs, and rock and roll what a waste I had become. Money was my GOD, sexual depravity with other women. Anger, bitterness, fear controlled my life how far I had fallen since I was fifteen.

 I was lost inside and out I no longer wanted to live. I thought I was so tough that nothing could penetrate the walls I had built, my heart was so dark nothing could cause it hurt. I was wrong; thank GOD I was so wrong, At thirty my wife; the mother of my children, came to me and said she had filed for divorce. I felt something a crack. She told me she didn’t love me – another crack! The anger came, then the hurt, bitterness followed. I ran outside as tears began to fall! No it couldn’t be my mind screamed! I couldn’t’ be hurt it was impossible! I knew I was no longer human I was less than the animals I hung with.

 But GOD knew me better than I did! He saw the child inside. The scared, hurt, trembling child that was searching for the one that could love the unlovable. I wasn’t worthy I knew this so did GOD but thankfully it wasn’t about what I deserved!

 The walls broke that night and for several weeks after I did the unthinkable I cried not just tears but I wailed, I screamed, I became broken! GOD had allowed me to make my own decisions the same as He does you. Decisions that the Devil meant for harm but GOD used for good! I remember crying out something like if your real GOD stop this hurt! He didn’t. I bargained give me back my wife and I’ll serve you! He knew I wouldn’t. This time I had to become so broken that only the GOD of creation could reshape me. I finally said LORD if your there help me. I am so sorry, HELP ME GOD! PLEASE help me! I accepted JESUS’S invitation to be my friend that day.

 He is my LORD and my MASTER now. I asked His forgiveness and for Him to make of me what He wanted. I still had things to pay for things from my past; I went to prison, my wife divorced me, I lost my children, my home, vehicles I had nothing materially when I got out of prison. I stayed in a Salvation Army Shelter. Materially nothing, but I had a friend, a GOD that loved me!

He restored my friendship with Lorie we never remarried but she became my friend again. At thirty-five she passed away just prior to her dying we talked and I was able to talk to her about GOD. She told me that she had made it right with Him. Even though my heart hurt when we buried her I knew one day I would see her again.

GOD gave me a new wife. He restored my children. He gave me more than I ever had, not materially; at least not yet, but in peace, in love for others, compassion, and in character you see the person I was is dead. I am far from perfect what I am is forgiven. In Galatians 6:17-21 Paul states “Have some of you noticed that we are not yet perfect? (No great surprise, right?) And are you ready to make the accusation that since people like me, who go through Christ in order to get things right with God, aren't perfectly virtuous, Christ must therefore be an accessory to sin? The accusation is frivolous. If I was "trying to be good," I would be rebuilding the same old barn that I tore down. I would be acting as a charlatan.  What actually took place is this: I tried keeping rules and working my head off to please God, and it didn't work. So I quit being a "law man" so that I could be God's man. Christ's life showed me how, and enabled me to do it. I identified myself completely with him. Indeed, I have been crucified with Christ. My ego is no longer central. It is no longer important that I appear righteous before you or have your good opinion, and I am no longer driven to impress God. Christ lives in me. The life you see me living is not "mine," but it is lived by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. I am not going to go back on that.”

You too can find the peace I found. The GOD I serve loves you so much HE sent his son to take your place( John 3:16-17). Inside you know that there is emptiness, and no matter what you try nothing can fill it but CHRIST. Are you tired like I was? Do you want peace that is beyond anything you have ever known? I am not telling you there are not troubles; there are (Romans 12:12), what I am telling you is you do not have to go it alone JESUS waits, just open your hearts door and ask Him in!

 Be honest! He already knows.

“Lord I am tired, I ache inside, I feel so alone, I’m scared (whatever it is on your heart). Lord I know I am a sinner, and I am sorry (Romans 3:23). I know I can’t save myself I need you JESUS. I believe by faith that You were born to a virgin, that You died on a cross for me, and that You rose from the grave three days later. I turn from my sins. I ask you JESUS to forgive me come into my heart becoming my Savior, my LORD and MASTER. I receive You as my LORD. Thank You, Jesus, for saving me.”

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If you are a brother or sister in CHRIST JESUS. Trust GOD to be and do what He says he is and will! Quit trying to do it in your own power. GOD is waiting for you to surrender your life to Him wholly. The Bible even says we are to be slaves to Him(Romans 6:16 and Romans 6:22). Guess what being a slave to GOD is good because our master will supply all our needs, not our wants but our needs. But GOD is not just a master to us He is our Father (ABBA).

Try it His way, put your faith in our creator. Turn back to Him fully. Make a commitment to GOD today, this minute let us take back what we have allowed the enemy to steal. Our relationship with Him, our nation, our spouse, our children, our family, friends, etc. whatever the enemy has stolen take it back! In 2^nd Timothy 4:3-5 we are told to be calm, cool, and steady do the work of an evangelist. We are at all times to pray one for another (James 5:16) "Confess to one another therefore your faults (your slips, your false steps, your offenses, your sins) and pray [also] for one another, that you may be healed and restored [to a spiritual tone of mind and heart]. The earnest (heartfelt, continued) prayer of a righteous man makes tremendous power available [dynamic in its working]." (AMP).

Seek ye first the Kingdom of GOD so that one day we to will be able to say as Paul in 2 Tim 4:7-8 “I have fought the good (worthy, honorable, and noble) fight, I have finished the race, I have kept (firmly held) the faith. [As to what remains] henceforth there is laid up for me the [victor's] crown of righteousness [for being right with God and doing right], which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me and recompense me on that [great] day — and not to me only, but also to all those who have loved and yearned for and welcomed His appearing (His return).